Third Point
My friends who wonder how I am and are astonished at my meeting in patience every calamity, silently ask the following question: “How can you endure the difficulties you’re faced with, when formerly you were very proud and angry and could not endure even the least insult?”
The Answer: Listen to two short stories about two incidents and you will receive your answer:
The First Story
Two years ago an official spoke insultingly and contemptuously about me behind my back. They told me about it later. A vein of temperament remaining from the Old Said made me feel upset about it for about an hour. Then through Allah the Most High’s mercy the following occurred to me; it dispelled the distress and made me forgive the man. It was this:
I addressed my soul saying: if his insults and the faults he described concerned my person, may Allah be pleased with him, because he recalled the faults of my soul. If he spoke the truth, he prompted me to train my soul and helped to save me from arrogance. If he spoke falsely, he helped to save me from hypocrisy and undeserved fame, the source of hypocrisy. No, I am not reconciled with my soul, for I have not trained it. If someone tells me there is a scorpion on my neck or breast or else points it out to me, I should be grateful to him, not offended.
If the man’s insults were directed at my belief and my being a servant of the Qur’an, it does not concern me. I refer him to the Qur’an’s Owner, who employs me. He is mighty, He is wise.
And if it was merely to curse at me, insult me, and blacken my character, that does not concern me either. For I am an exile, a prisoner, a stranger, and my hands are tied; it does not fall to me to try to restore my honour myself. To do so is the business of the authorities of this village where I am a guest and under surveillance, then of the district, then of the province. Insulting a person’s prisoner concerns the person; he defends the prisoner.
Since that was the reality of the matter, my heart became easy. I declared: My [own] affair I commit to Allah; for Allah [ever] watches over His servants. I thought of the incident as not having happened. But unfortunately it was later understood that the Qur’an had not forgiven the man.
The Second Story
This year I heard that an incident had occurred. Although I only heard a brief account of it after it had happened, I was treated as though I had been closely connected with it. Anyway I hardly correspond with anyone, and if I do, I only write extremely rarely to a friend concerning some question of belief. In fact I have written only one letter to my brother in four years. Both I prevent myself from mixing with others, and the worldly prevent me. I have only been able to meet with one or two close friends once or twice a week. As for visitors to the village, once or twice a month perhaps one or two used to meet with me for one or two minutes concerning some matter to do with the hereafter.
In exile, a stranger, alone, with no one, I was barred from everything, from everyone, in a village that was unsuitable for someone like me to work for a livelihood. As a matter of fact, four years ago I repaired a tumble‑down mosque. Although with the certificate I had from my own region to act an imam and preacher, I acted as imam in the mosque for four years (May Allah accept it), this past Ramadan I could not go there. Sometimes I performed the five daily prayers alone. I was deprived of the twenty-fivefold merit of performing the prayers in congregation.
I showed the same patience and forbearance in the face of these two incidents that befell me as I did in the face of that official’s treatment two years ago. If Allah so wills I shall continue to do so. I think like this, and say:
if this ill‑treatment, distress, and oppression inflicted on me by the worldly is for my faulty soul, I forgive it. Perhaps my soul will be reformed by means of it, and perhaps it will be atonement for its sins. I have experienced many good things in this guesthouse of the world; if I experience a little of its trials, I shall still offer thanks.
But if the worldly oppress me because of my service of belief and the Qur’an, it is not up to me to defend it. I refer it to the Mighty and Compelling One.
If their intention is to destroy the regard in which I am held generally, to expunge my undeserved fame, which is baseless and causes hypocrisy and destroys sincerity, may Allah the Most High bless them! For to be held in high regard by people generally and gain a name among them is harmful for people like me. Those who have dealings with me know that I do not want respect to be shown to me, indeed, I can’t abide it. I have even scolded a valuable friend of mine perhaps fifty times for show‑ ing me excessive respect.
If their intention in slandering me, belittling me in the eyes of the people, and defaming me is aimed at the truths of belief and the Qur’an of which I am the interpreter, it is pointless. For a veil cannot be drawn over the stars of the Qur’an. A person who closes his eyes only himself does not see; he does not make it night for anyone else.