Again the idea of thinking only of myself took hold of me, and I said: “Don’t let anyone come!” And I was taken from that place of exile and sent to a third, to Barla.
And in Barla whenever a slackness has come over me and the idea of thinking of myself alone has gripped me, one of these serpents and two-faced hypocrites from among ‘the worldly’1 has been set to pester me. During this eight years eighty such incidents have befallen me; I could recount them, but am cutting them short so as not to bore people.
My brothers! I have described some of the compassionate slaps I have received, now if you will permit it and forgive me, I shall relate some that have befallen you. Don’t be offended. If anyone is offended, I will not put his name.
My true brother and first and most superior and self-sacrificing student, Abdülmecid,2 had a fine house in Van. He was well-off and he was a teacher. Following his own ideas, he did not join those who were attempting to send me to the border region against my wishes, which was a place more in need of Qur’anic service, and as though for my benefit, did not vote for it. As though, if I had gone there, my service of the Qur’an would not have been apolitical or sincere, and they would have expelled him from Van – so he did not take part. But he received a compassionate slap contrary to his intentions, for he had to leave both Van, and his beautiful house, and his native region; he was compelled to go to Ergani.
Hulûsi Bey3 was crucial to our service of the Qur’an. There were a number of things when he returned to his native region from Eğridir that would have afforded him much enjoyment and worldly happiness, perhaps causing him to become slack in his service of the Qur’an, which pertains solely to the hereafter. For he was reunited with his parents, whom he had not seen for a long time, and he was back home, and because he had returned there with rank and honour, the world was smiling on him and appeared good. However, for those employed in serving the Qur’an, either the world must be vexed with them, or they must be vexed at the world, so that they can perform that service sincerely and earnestly.
‘The worldly’ (ehl-i dünya): those whose view is restricted to the life of this world, and who disregard the hereafter, or those who sell religion for this world. (Tr.)
See note 1, page 58. (Tr.)
See note 2, page 58. (Tr.)